Sample Quotes for September, 1998

Taken from The 637 Best Things Anybody Ever Said and sequels, 
by Robert Byrne

"Is life worth living? That depends on the liver."

"When turkeys mate they think of swans."
     Johnny Carson

"A bird in the hand is dead."

"Are you going to come quietly or do I have to use earplugs?"
     Spike Milligan

"The Jewish position on abortion is that a foetus is a foetus until it gets out of medical school."

"I'd rather be black than gay because when you're black you don't have to tell your mother."
     Charles Pierce

"If you look like your passport photo, you're too ill to travel."
     Will Kommen

"I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you."

"A hick town is one in which there is no place to go that you shouldn't be."
     Alexander Woolcott

"Instead of getting married again, I'm just going to buy a house and give it to a woman I don't like."
     Lewis Grizzard

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